Friday, December 4, 2009

Holidays

Dear All,
Thanksgiving and Laid Kabir have passed since the last time I talked to you. I will start with Thanksgiving, three of my friends came over to my house for the holiday, which was so nice. We made pies, mashed potatoes, my favorite Jell-O fruit salad, green beans, stuffing, sweet potatoes, and turkey. My friend Tim raised a turkey for this year’s holiday but it turned out to be a disappointment, there was barely any meat on the turkey. I know nothing about raising turkeys but this one was a disgrace. How long do you have to raise a turkey before it is ready to eat? We bought other turkey to make up for it and the meal turned out to be amazing. I even made meringue by hand, Grandma you taught me well. We were doubtful that the meringue would ever fluff up but with enough manpower it happened. I have decided that in America we have too many appliances, we can just do it by hand and then not have crowded kitchens with mixers and all kinds of gadgets. I have even discovered how to make toast without a toaster.
Once the meal was prepared we had a nice family style dinner and sat around discussing what we were thankful for. This year I am thankful for having such great new and old friends, my family, and for my growth in this past year. Last year I was surrounded by such negative volunteers who all wanted to go home, now they have gone home and I have been graced by the presence of three new volunteers that don’t take a single moment for granted.
Two days after Thanksgiving was the big holiday here in Morocco where they slaughter a sheep, Laid Kabir. I went to my host family’s house to celebrate and it was a great day. I have been dreading this day for months now because they like to eat the stomach and head and heart and lungs and all the icky parts we through out in the states. This year wasn’t as bad, I guess I am getting used to this place. I spent the day with my host family and then spent the evening resting and trying to get the taste of sheep out of my mouth, which never happened; I have been eating at peoples houses everyday since and continue to eat sheep. It has a real gamey taste that I hate. Last night I decided that I needed to take a break because it got to the point where everything tasted like sheep, even raspberry crystal light.
I am almost finished with a Christmas video that I am sending home because this is the first Christmas I will be away from home. I wanted to share my life here with you all so you could get a better idea of how and where I live. In the video I filmed the sheep slaughter but don’t give you any warning when it is coming, sorry, my host family didn’t give me much warning either. Last year they slaughtered the sheep themselves and they made quit a production of it, but this year someone came over and slaughtered the sheep. This is how they do it in cities, the town butcher goes around to all the houses and does the killing for them. I guess Imi n Tlit is transforming into a city, HaJ
Work wise my focus has completely changed. I have started working more with the middle school students and have stopped going to my neddy as much. The neddy has started making sandals and it has essentially becoming a sweatshop, but they are happy about it. The girls make 24 dirham’s a month, which is less than a penny a day. I just read a New York Times article about how sweat shops have helped women’s rights, because when they have some kind of income women have more of a say what happens in the household. Also, if women have an income they tend to spend it on the family, where as men tend to spend it on liquor and prostitutes.
Since the neddy is always transforming into something new I decided that I needed more stable work, so I have started teaching English in the Middle School. I am remembering why I wanted to be a teacher, when I am in front of a classroom I get an adrenaline rush, and I am so excited. I also figure if I can teach Middle School students in another language I can teach anyone. I am really gaining confidence in myself. Even if I don’t become a teacher it is helping me have the courage to get up in front of a crowd and speak. Yesterday, I had thirty students and it is hard to keep control of that many kids, small class sizes are important.
I have no idea what I am going to do when I get home, but I am really trying to focus on living one day at a time. I freak out when I think into the future, it is amazing to me how much weight is taken off your shoulders when you just take one day at a time.
After saying all this I will tell you my thoughts on my future, I have been thinking that for the summer I am going to move to Minneapolis and find some kinds of low-grade job and live with friends. This idea excites me because it has been so long since I have gotten to hang out with my childhood friends. But, then today I was reading Into the Wild and was thinking that I need to move to Alaska for the summer. This also excites me because it is somewhere I have seen and heard so much about. I would love to work at Denali National Park or do something in the wilderness because moving to a city seems really daunting at this point.
After the summer it is up in the air, I will apply all over and see what happens and who hires me. I am still focusing on D.C. and Afghanistan. It is crazy to me that I am more afraid of moving back to America than I am about moving to Afghanistan. I feel like I can relate better to Moroccan culture than my own at this point, and Afghanistan is just a way more intense kind of Morocco. We will see if Obama’s troop insurgence will permit me to find a job working for an NGO in Afghanistan. I can’t think about it all now, it is too much.
Last week I talked to my dad and for the first time he didn’t make me more stressed about my future. He had some great advice about just going with it and that the unknown is apart of living and not a bad thing. My dad is reading this new book and it is doing wonders for his advice giving skills. Usually, when I talk to Sachel or my dad I end the conversation being really stressed out, but this past week I really just felt like my life will be good if I keep living it and don’t get scared. The worst thing I could do is get scared and choose a life of comfort. For some people that is what they want and now is the time in their lives to settle down, not me! I need to keep drifting around this world and keep learning everything that I can. Someday's, I am really jealous of my friends that have everything figured out and their lives seem known and mine seems like such a mess, but this is how I want to live, and I am determined to make it work out for me. Well, I have been going on for a long time and now it is time for me to close.
I love you all and Happy Holidays,
Emmy
Give Santa a high-five for me this year, because Santa has forgets to come to Morocco.